Monday, October 26, 2009

just...

cant sleep tonite.
so i write..
got nothing specific in my mind right now.
so i just blab.

first on why i cant sleep.
kuz i deliberately drink nescafe.
i knew that i cant sleep when i drink it
but i still want to.
and i knew nescafe hv some side effects on me.
lepas minum mesti badan berangin.
perut masuk angin and cepat lapar.
kalau tak makan b4 minum nescafe,
i will be starve and tangan menggigil.
but still i love nescafe.
i dont know why....
degil betul.

haha.
sok ade kuiz.
and i've studied halfway only.
takde mood la nk belajar.
i'm good at procrastinating.
really good.
my lecturer said people who procrastinate are super optimistic people.
is it?
maybe....is it a good thing?
he said no.... but i dont know.
some things hv their pros and cons i guess.

i'm googling and searching for bleach wallpapers.
dont exactly find what i'm looking for,
but i just stick around.
maybe something good will come out.
nk carik more espada pics...
and also vaizaard.
haha.
crazy abt grimmjaw and kensei....
wonder if grimm still alive?

just...

cant sleep tonite.
so i write..
got nothing specific in my mind right now.
so i just blab.

first on why i cant sleep.
kuz i deliberately drink nescafe.
i knew that i cant sleep when i drink it
but i still want to.
and i knew nescafe hv some side effects on me.
lepas minum mesti badan berangin.
perut masuk angin and cepat lapar.
kalau tak makan b4 minum nescafe,
i will be starve and tangan menggigil.
but still i love nescafe.
i dont know why....
degil betul.

haha.
sok ade kuiz.
and i've studied halfway only.
takde mood la nk belajar.
i'm good at procrastinating.
really good.
my lecturer said people who procrastinate are super optimistic people.
is it?
maybe....is it a good thing?
he said no.... but i dont know.
some things hv their pros and cons i guess.

i'm googling and searching for bleach wallpapers.
dont exactly find what i'm looking for,
but i just stick around.
maybe something good will come out.
nk carik more espada pics...
and also vaizaard.
haha.
crazy abt grimmjaw and kensei....
wonder if grimm still alive?

Sunday, October 25, 2009

think b4 doing smthing

hehe...
current events in my life makes me smile..
senyuman jahat.

got a text from my EX-bestie.
asking me to go out wif her....
i was baffled.
what in the hell did she wants me to hang out wif her....
after she told me that she didnt need me and all that crap i didnt care to remember.
heh.
and all of a sudden...
makes me laugh really.
something to learn from this.
do not ever do something, or say something to someone you're close with
without thinking.
especially if you're in a bad mood... angry,sad,annoyed or anything.
just keep whatever you want to say to yourself first,
and think abt the consequences of those things you're abt to say/do
kuz if you just blurt it out without thinking
it may come back to you..

it seems to me that that EX-bestie
is licking her own spit (gross but it's appropriate in this case)
haha
it seems to me that she wants me back as her friends.
and it's not like i'm being unforgiving and vengeful person
but it's hard to be friends wif someone who told you she'd rather be friends wif someone else.
it's kinda weird to me...
even talking to her seems weird to me.
it's worse than talking to someone you just meet.

yeahh..
it seems impossible for me to be close to her again...
even being friends wif her again is unimaginable to me.
i've been trying to avoid her whenever i can.
it's just weird.
we used to be so close, everywhere together...
and all of the sudden, we're not together anymore.
some people ask..
and thankfully (and incidentally) our classes are not the same this semester.
so i used that as an excuse.
some people who knows us or more observant will understand why.

seriously.....
it seems that she's been making some efforts to make up with us,
discreetly (and no apologies apparently,which we are expecting..)
makes me think....
maybe her so called 'other' friends are not as good as us...
or she just missed us...
kuz we used to be like siblings and all that...
and we share almost everything...
she lost a few confidantes by uttering those words.
and now,she wants us back.
and she might not get us back now.

think b4 doing smthing

hehe...
current events in my life makes me smile..
senyuman jahat.

got a text from my EX-bestie.
asking me to go out wif her....
i was baffled.
what in the hell did she wants me to hang out wif her....
after she told me that she didnt need me and all that crap i didnt care to remember.
heh.
and all of a sudden...
makes me laugh really.
something to learn from this.
do not ever do something, or say something to someone you're close with
without thinking.
especially if you're in a bad mood... angry,sad,annoyed or anything.
just keep whatever you want to say to yourself first,
and think abt the consequences of those things you're abt to say/do
kuz if you just blurt it out without thinking
it may come back to you..

it seems to me that that EX-bestie
is licking her own spit (gross but it's appropriate in this case)
haha
it seems to me that she wants me back as her friends.
and it's not like i'm being unforgiving and vengeful person
but it's hard to be friends wif someone who told you she'd rather be friends wif someone else.
it's kinda weird to me...
even talking to her seems weird to me.
it's worse than talking to someone you just meet.

yeahh..
it seems impossible for me to be close to her again...
even being friends wif her again is unimaginable to me.
i've been trying to avoid her whenever i can.
it's just weird.
we used to be so close, everywhere together...
and all of the sudden, we're not together anymore.
some people ask..
and thankfully (and incidentally) our classes are not the same this semester.
so i used that as an excuse.
some people who knows us or more observant will understand why.

seriously.....
it seems that she's been making some efforts to make up with us,
discreetly (and no apologies apparently,which we are expecting..)
makes me think....
maybe her so called 'other' friends are not as good as us...
or she just missed us...
kuz we used to be like siblings and all that...
and we share almost everything...
she lost a few confidantes by uttering those words.
and now,she wants us back.
and she might not get us back now.

Friday, October 23, 2009

HyDe-sama

heeeeeeee..............
sy sgt2 menyukai lelaki yg dlm gmbr diatas.
sebabnye........
die tersangatlah comel,bergaye,stylo,hensem,dan yg sewaktu dgnnye.
juge suke tgk bile die menyanyi,
tak kire la live performance ke @ dlm video klip...
tersangatlah menarik perhatian dan minat sy....
live performance die best.
suare btul2 cm dlm album.
one thing i like when watching his videos (apart from his singing and kadang2 dancing yg weird and eccentric )
is his hair.
cool gile kot hairstyle die.
one day i'll do my hair just like his dlm pv love addict.

i see him perfect as a vampire.
i mean....
he's already into that kinda stuff...
he played a vampire in moonchild.
and his side project, vamps (obviously.... from vampire)
dgn vid love addict yg die pkai contact lens merah and fake fangs tu...
mmg perfect la die jadi vampire.
hyde, prince of darkness..hehehe.....

one more thing...
i dont know why,
tapi i see hyde as someone who is like....
watak dlm manga @ anime....
seriously...
he looks just like some handsome cool guys from some shoujo manga...
hehehe..
his wife and kids are soooooo...lucky.

HyDe-sama

heeeeeeee..............
sy sgt2 menyukai lelaki yg dlm gmbr diatas.
sebabnye........
die tersangatlah comel,bergaye,stylo,hensem,dan yg sewaktu dgnnye.
juge suke tgk bile die menyanyi,
tak kire la live performance ke @ dlm video klip...
tersangatlah menarik perhatian dan minat sy....
live performance die best.
suare btul2 cm dlm album.
one thing i like when watching his videos (apart from his singing and kadang2 dancing yg weird and eccentric )
is his hair.
cool gile kot hairstyle die.
one day i'll do my hair just like his dlm pv love addict.

i see him perfect as a vampire.
i mean....
he's already into that kinda stuff...
he played a vampire in moonchild.
and his side project, vamps (obviously.... from vampire)
dgn vid love addict yg die pkai contact lens merah and fake fangs tu...
mmg perfect la die jadi vampire.
hyde, prince of darkness..hehehe.....

one more thing...
i dont know why,
tapi i see hyde as someone who is like....
watak dlm manga @ anime....
seriously...
he looks just like some handsome cool guys from some shoujo manga...
hehehe..
his wife and kids are soooooo...lucky.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

mad.....again

sy marah lg....
sbb sy rase nk marah...
sbb sy rase sy patut marah.
tak kisah la kalau org lain rase sy tak patut marha.
still sy nk marah gk.
sukati sy la nk marah ke tak.
sy pun manusie gk.
manusie ade perasaan...
ade hak nk rase gembire,sedih,marah...
jadi secare automatik sy pun ade hak utk marah.
jadi sy marah lah.

tapi sy penat lps marah.
sbb tu sy tak suke marah....
sy jarang marah pun.
kt sekolah dulu, sy sgt jarang marah sampai bile sy nk marah je..
kawan2 sy pujuk sy jgn marah.
sbb diorang takut sy marah.
org yg jarang marah, bile marah menakutkan.
agknye sy marah bg diorang menakutkan kot....
tak tau lah.....

tp sekarang sy selalu la gk marah.
makin dewase ni byk pulak bende yg blh buat sy marah.
tapi biasenye sy marah kejap je....
pastu okey dahhh...
tapi hari ni mcm nk marah lame sikit.
maybe 1 malam kot sy nk marah....
sbb sy tertekan gk sekarang....
dan juge sy nk salahkan hormon sy yg tak stabil utk kemarahan sy ni

sy rase sy berhak utk marah,
tapi sy taktau la ape org lain rase bile sy marah....
mereke kate sy ni mcm kurang perasaan sikit...
sikit je la kot.

sekarang sy dah sakit kepale sbb marah...
sy marah sgt sampai sy menangis.
hebat gk la sy marah kali ni
mungkin bg org sbb sy marah kali ni sgt remeh...
mcm mengade2 pulak nk marah gile2 sbb hal kecik..
tetapi...........
bile sbb yg kecik tu + hormon sy yg tak stabil + perasaan tertekan sy sbb nk exam + perasaan sy yg mmg ade selame ni yg mengatakan sy ni kurang berharge (sy rase sy ade inferiority complex) + sy suke simpan dlm hati je ape yg sy rase + sakit perut sbb lapar dan lain2 sebab = kemarahan yg teramat sgt yg sy rase sekarang.

adakah kemarahan sy blh dijustifiedkan?
ataupun mmg sy suke marah tak tentu pasal?
demmmmmmm.... sy tak suke marah.
jadi tolonglah kawan2 sy jgn la buat sy marah sgt2............
sy penat.

mad.....again

sy marah lg....
sbb sy rase nk marah...
sbb sy rase sy patut marah.
tak kisah la kalau org lain rase sy tak patut marha.
still sy nk marah gk.
sukati sy la nk marah ke tak.
sy pun manusie gk.
manusie ade perasaan...
ade hak nk rase gembire,sedih,marah...
jadi secare automatik sy pun ade hak utk marah.
jadi sy marah lah.

tapi sy penat lps marah.
sbb tu sy tak suke marah....
sy jarang marah pun.
kt sekolah dulu, sy sgt jarang marah sampai bile sy nk marah je..
kawan2 sy pujuk sy jgn marah.
sbb diorang takut sy marah.
org yg jarang marah, bile marah menakutkan.
agknye sy marah bg diorang menakutkan kot....
tak tau lah.....

tp sekarang sy selalu la gk marah.
makin dewase ni byk pulak bende yg blh buat sy marah.
tapi biasenye sy marah kejap je....
pastu okey dahhh...
tapi hari ni mcm nk marah lame sikit.
maybe 1 malam kot sy nk marah....
sbb sy tertekan gk sekarang....
dan juge sy nk salahkan hormon sy yg tak stabil utk kemarahan sy ni

sy rase sy berhak utk marah,
tapi sy taktau la ape org lain rase bile sy marah....
mereke kate sy ni mcm kurang perasaan sikit...
sikit je la kot.

sekarang sy dah sakit kepale sbb marah...
sy marah sgt sampai sy menangis.
hebat gk la sy marah kali ni
mungkin bg org sbb sy marah kali ni sgt remeh...
mcm mengade2 pulak nk marah gile2 sbb hal kecik..
tetapi...........
bile sbb yg kecik tu + hormon sy yg tak stabil + perasaan tertekan sy sbb nk exam + perasaan sy yg mmg ade selame ni yg mengatakan sy ni kurang berharge (sy rase sy ade inferiority complex) + sy suke simpan dlm hati je ape yg sy rase + sakit perut sbb lapar dan lain2 sebab = kemarahan yg teramat sgt yg sy rase sekarang.

adakah kemarahan sy blh dijustifiedkan?
ataupun mmg sy suke marah tak tentu pasal?
demmmmmmm.... sy tak suke marah.
jadi tolonglah kawan2 sy jgn la buat sy marah sgt2............
sy penat.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

changes....

lots of changes happen around the world everyday....
2 of my frenz get together today *yeay!!!*
and my nenek went to live with my uncle for a change, once in a while...

and also.....
this damn thing happen!!!
aku nk transfer lagu dr laptop ke phone thru bluetooth....
and suddenly........
suddenly.......
tak blh!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sbb tetibe die mintak pass code utk bluetooth!!!
demmmmm!!!!!
mane la aku ingat!!
tak tau pon....
cane nk bluetooth ni????
ni yg nk mengamuk ni!!!
suke2 die je nk change setting.
b4 this takde la prosedur pelik2 cani...
byk lagi bende aku kene ingat selain pass code utk bluetooth.
issshhhhhhhhh

ade ke..
dahla internet connection asyik nk menyakitkan hati aku je.
slow mcm kure2 tak makan seminggu....
siput tuuttt pun lg laju...
geram sungguh.......

changes....

lots of changes happen around the world everyday....
2 of my frenz get together today *yeay!!!*
and my nenek went to live with my uncle for a change, once in a while...

and also.....
this damn thing happen!!!
aku nk transfer lagu dr laptop ke phone thru bluetooth....
and suddenly........
suddenly.......
tak blh!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sbb tetibe die mintak pass code utk bluetooth!!!
demmmmm!!!!!
mane la aku ingat!!
tak tau pon....
cane nk bluetooth ni????
ni yg nk mengamuk ni!!!
suke2 die je nk change setting.
b4 this takde la prosedur pelik2 cani...
byk lagi bende aku kene ingat selain pass code utk bluetooth.
issshhhhhhhhh

ade ke..
dahla internet connection asyik nk menyakitkan hati aku je.
slow mcm kure2 tak makan seminggu....
siput tuuttt pun lg laju...
geram sungguh.......

Monday, October 12, 2009

nearing the end of the semester
byk kerje...
assignment...
presentations...
quizzes...
tests...
and even a midterm!!!
ok!!
berusaha!!!
nearing the end of the semester
byk kerje...
assignment...
presentations...
quizzes...
tests...
and even a midterm!!!
ok!!
berusaha!!!

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

maD

sy marah...
sy taktau sy marah dgn siape....
tp sy marah.

feel like they're taking me for granted.
carik aku bile diperlukan je.
when they want company to eat kt kafe...
when they want sum1 to walk to pasar mlm wif them
when they hv to go to meetings and tak kenal sesiape....
when they want to do sumthing tp takde kwn nk buat bende tu.

sumtimes i'm thinking,
semue bende yg diorg ajak aku buat...
all that offers, outings, lunches & dinners...
are that really kuz they want me 2b there?
or just merely kuz i'm always free and they need sum1 for company?

and bile i'm alone...and ajak diorang do sumthing,
most of the time it's rejected.
typical.
expected.
'inferior'ing myself more.
rase mcm i'm worthless.
mcm they all with me kuz i'm the convenient one.
not kuz they really want me.

pathetic kan?
damn btol....
being adults r no fun.
being negative is painful.
not caring is less pain.

maD

sy marah...
sy taktau sy marah dgn siape....
tp sy marah.

feel like they're taking me for granted.
carik aku bile diperlukan je.
when they want company to eat kt kafe...
when they want sum1 to walk to pasar mlm wif them
when they hv to go to meetings and tak kenal sesiape....
when they want to do sumthing tp takde kwn nk buat bende tu.

sumtimes i'm thinking,
semue bende yg diorg ajak aku buat...
all that offers, outings, lunches & dinners...
are that really kuz they want me 2b there?
or just merely kuz i'm always free and they need sum1 for company?

and bile i'm alone...and ajak diorang do sumthing,
most of the time it's rejected.
typical.
expected.
'inferior'ing myself more.
rase mcm i'm worthless.
mcm they all with me kuz i'm the convenient one.
not kuz they really want me.

pathetic kan?
damn btol....
being adults r no fun.
being negative is painful.
not caring is less pain.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

NeW DisCoVeRy....

he... just discover a new side of me...
a new shopaholic me....
an hour and a half at klcc and half my money is gone....
on books... and some hair clips..
huhuuu...
tu baru usha kasut, tak bli lg....
too much money to spend on a day....
never mind...
i'll come back wif a revenge.

and terpakse ikat perut for a few days sbb nk save duit.
pathetic isn't it?
and that's not all!!!
i'm addicted to internet.!!
can't live without going online, even for a day.
suffice to say internet completes my life.
(my sis will say, tu la takder pakwe... kan dah ketagih internet....)
suke hati la...internet ni aku byr sendiri ape.. (my answer to her nnt =D)

ade lagi.....
newest addiction.
online shopping....huhuhuuu (another way to lessen my bank account )
setakat ni dah bli a few clothes... a purse and a bag (otw)... and tempted to buy more...
those blogs are truly addictive (and dangerous for my money too)
and it is way easier to shop online...
takyah g siap2, tunggu bas yg selalu lmbt... bersesak2 kt mall and all that.
just go on9 and surf....

now i need to curb my addiction sblm aku terkosongkan akaun aku
(nk tggu scholarship msk a long way to go, mati kebuluranlah aku sblm tu...)
ngehhh...

gotta go browsing some more......

NeW DisCoVeRy....

he... just discover a new side of me...
a new shopaholic me....
an hour and a half at klcc and half my money is gone....
on books... and some hair clips..
huhuuu...
tu baru usha kasut, tak bli lg....
too much money to spend on a day....
never mind...
i'll come back wif a revenge.

and terpakse ikat perut for a few days sbb nk save duit.
pathetic isn't it?
and that's not all!!!
i'm addicted to internet.!!
can't live without going online, even for a day.
suffice to say internet completes my life.
(my sis will say, tu la takder pakwe... kan dah ketagih internet....)
suke hati la...internet ni aku byr sendiri ape.. (my answer to her nnt =D)

ade lagi.....
newest addiction.
online shopping....huhuhuuu (another way to lessen my bank account )
setakat ni dah bli a few clothes... a purse and a bag (otw)... and tempted to buy more...
those blogs are truly addictive (and dangerous for my money too)
and it is way easier to shop online...
takyah g siap2, tunggu bas yg selalu lmbt... bersesak2 kt mall and all that.
just go on9 and surf....

now i need to curb my addiction sblm aku terkosongkan akaun aku
(nk tggu scholarship msk a long way to go, mati kebuluranlah aku sblm tu...)
ngehhh...

gotta go browsing some more......